I have written in three other online spaces since I started blogging, around 2003. Two were public, and one was secret. I have always loved writing online, and with my sisters. A good thing, considering only a very select few people read the blogs and 4 out of the 8 or so readers actually were the girls. I have been compiling the entries to print out and make into a sort of journal or book, because I don’t want to lose that part of me and I would love to have it in a tangible form. I am excited because I loved myself back then (don’t worry, I still do but I’m just feeling nostalgic). I used way to many exclamation points, I was way too dramatic for my own good, I could write anything and no matter how bad it was I thought it was the deepest, truest thing ever to be written, I laughed, I loved, I was caring and selfish all at the same time, and (with much editing) would love to have it to give to my grandchildren some day.

Here is an excerpt from an entry in my livejournal from January 11, 2006.

i just watched the virgin suicides again, what an excellent movie.

it’s funny how it is just like our family, the story of five blonde daughters and their “mysterious existence”. the neighbour hood boys become obsessed with them and cherish even a discarded piece of paper, had it been used by one of the girls. That reminds me of the story [family friend, let's call him R.] told me, of how when he was younger and used to go dirt biking in our back forest but every summer would come to my house and ask my dad for permission. All my dad asked of him was to drive slowly down the driveway so as to not disturb/injure/scare his daughters and we would see R. making his was ever so slowly making his way down the driveway, literally going about 5 km/hour and we would laugh. he confessed to me later, when we became friends, that he always hoped we would be outside when he drove by so he could see one of us.

and even when he drives by my grandmas house, he always slows down to drive the speed limit, some sort of unspoken rule.

okay enough about that.

what i am really thinking?

i love the progression from thinking i need to write things down so we will have something to talk about, to thinking i need to write things down so i don’t run out of time to say them.
maybe that’s my favourite part … or one of them anyways.

Erica’s comment: Yes, we’re so similar to the movie aren’t we? Now about that mass suicide pact we have…

So, there is no mass suicide pact. Don’t worry. Maybe a pact to take over the world as soon as we all start exploding with babies, but that’s about it. God we are going to have awesome family get-togethers someday! We can watch our kids do all of the same crazy stuff that we used together.

And then a little about my budding relationship thrown in there, it was written about a month after Tim and I started dating. Aww! All I can remember about that time was how much fun we always had together.