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A Whole Lotta Love

September 14, 2011 By 2 Comments

Being her cute self

I touched a bit on how loving Hailey is with Brianna in Bri’s 2 month post, but I failed to mention how loving Hailey is with all her aunts, grandparents and most importantly Scott and me, her parents. Let me tell you about our bedtime last night and you can get a better glimpse of what an adorable and loving girl our Hailey is.

Setting the scene: Kate home alone at bedtime with 2 kids. Brianna tired and Hailey a hyper girl.

Hailey got back from a day with her grandparents. We sat and talked about her day (I talked/asked questions, she listened and repeated random words),  I nursed Brianna and we went to change her diaper. After we changed her diaper, I asked Hailey to get Brianna’s pjs, thinking that she probably wouldn’t, she then ran out of the room and came back a minute later with a pair of pjs for Brianna! Smart cookie that one! Then she climbed up on the bed (from a laundry basket full of clothes at the end of my bed, waiting to get put away…) and gave kisses to Brianna. Love.

Bath time for Hailey! She loves bath time, splashing up a storm and Brianna doesn’t mind hanging out in her bouncy chair watching. After bath time, we went to the living room, so I could attempt to bounce Brianna to sleep on the exercise ball and read Hailey books at the same time (yes, I am now a multitasking queen). We read a couple and I asked her to find her dog book, so she tore all the books off the shelf and brought me the right book (her current fave, not gonna lie, it was at the bottom of the pile so I could get a break from reading it and hid it there).

Then it was time to get Hailey ready for bed, we got her baby and blanket and put her in her sleep sack. She gave kisses to Brianna as I got her sippy cup of milk ready. She drank her milk with me holding her and once again bouncing Brianna to sleep in her bouncy chair. After just the right amount of bounces, Brianna looked content enough to leave her and Hailey and I walked to her room singing the ABCs (her bedtime song). She rubbed my nose with hers, a million times over, then reached for her crib, because we just started giving her a bit of a backrub before bedtime and she LOVES it. I was rubbing her back when she stood up, I started to protest because I thought she wanted me to pick her up, when she gave me a huge kiss and laid back down. melt my heart, holy moly.

I still get all heart swelly thinking about it , I just love that girl so much!

Bath time fun

Being super cute in the bath, and helping out with Brianna’s bath below.

Being a great help

Filed Under: Hailey, love

Ends, Goals & Accomplishments

February 18, 2011 By 2 Comments

Tim and I went on a date tonight. Going on dates is a very welcome change, in Calgary our ‘dates’ generally consisted of the grocery store and Canadian Tire – somehow we didn’t see each other much even though we lived together – but now that our schedules jive a bit better, we can spend more time together. However, adding a roommate in to the mix (we rent an awesome apartment with Tim’s best friend, Chubbs), we still don’t get much alone time to just hang out. Lately, Tim has taken on the habit of asking me out on official Dates, and it always makes me feel like a giddy little girl. Actually, I take that back. The first time he asked me I was convinced terrified he was going to propose, and I started the date off by saying “You know, this really ISN’T a good time to propose.” Let’s just say it wasn’t the greatest start to the date (to say the least). Now that I know they are innocent dates to spend time together, I am back to being a giddy little girl. He really is my best friend, I just love him.

I love our dates. I always promised myself that if I ever get to the point in a relationship where dates consist of silent dinners staring at the nearest television or ceiling tile, I would never go on dates with that partner ever again. Alas, we have a lot of fun on our dates, fun conversations, serious conversations, googly eyes, you get the point.

Tonight the conversation turned to my job situation (as it often does). I currently hold two jobs – one in retail and one as a bartender, but neither of them are in my desired field (aside: I have an interview next week! REJOICE!). Tim is one of my biggest cheerleaders, he encourages me and he pushes me. Tonight, he found out the difference between pushing me, and pushing me over the edge (cue tears). Tonight, we took the opportunity to set some goals for ourselves. There are times that I feel so left behind, that all of my older sisters and family and friends are all moving forward so quickly, but I am sitting so stagnant, torn between insane jealousy of their lives and relief at the low levels of responsibility in mine (Lauren: unmarried, childless sister solidarity unite. At least we can go out every Friday and Saturday night and not have to worry about babysitters or screaming babies during hangovers!). Tim recognized my frustration and pointed out that once I get a job, it will be the end of job searching. Once we finish paying off debts, it will be the end of debt (until a mortgage, obviously) et cetera, et cetera.

I hate that word, end. I told him I have had too many ends this past year, that I can’t take any more ends. However, beginnings isn’t a great word because beginnings aren’t always easy either. Goals doesn’t work because it’s overused, and often loses it’s meaning to me. Tim suggested that we set ‘accomplishments’ for ourselves, both individually and as a couple. I loved the idea of reaching an accomplishment. It gives me the connotation of a real pat on the back, of working hard towards something and really being able to reap the benefits. Tonight we set some very serious accomplishments for our lives, both in the immediate future and a long ways down the road. I’ve been feeling very ‘blagh’ about my life lately, but after talking to him, I feel more excited about my future. Once we have reached all of our accomplishments my life will be in a much different place, but a place that I am excited to be in.

(P.S. For all of you waiting with bated breath for an ‘annoucement’ from Tim and I – stop! Both fortunately and very unfortunately there will be no announcements anytime soon. This is mostly for Tim’s Dad, who is very, very excited about the prospects of weddings and grandchildren. Sorry, John!)

Filed Under: life, love

Lessons from Dad

November 19, 2010 By 8 Comments

Having had grown up in a family with five daughters, we often heard the words “Your poor father!” In my youth, I never really understood what people meant by that – I had a house full of people and lots of love and toys and books, how could it get any better? Eventually, I kinda ‘got it’ -sure, Dad sometimes got overshadowed by the overbearing estrogen that radiated through our house, but I don’t think he ever felt sorry for himself. And even though him and my Mom had originally wanted a house full of boys (true story), in my biased opinion, I’m quite positive that he feels he feels he got a pretty good deal with us girls. I’ve learned a lot from my Dad over the years, and here is some wisdom from my Dad to share with you.

1.) ‘Loser’ is a swear word. My Dad would NOT permit use of this word in our house. He would look past a few eff bombs before he would let this one by. Maybe he was the original anti-bullying campaigner.

2.) Love is the most important possession. When us girls were just wee curly haired bleach blondes running around in our underwear, we lived in a trailer on our grandparents property. That means five rambunctious children and two adults living in a small trailer – can you say cramped? This was while my parents were preparing to buy our Farm, and I’m pretty sure we lived off of love at the time. To this day, my Dad says these were some of the best years of his life, and he would give anything to go back to then. We didn’t have much, but we had each other and that was the most important thing.

3.) If you can’t say anything nice then don’t say anything at all. I heard this so often during my childhood that I can actually hear my Dad’s voice saying this in my head when I write it down. I still try to live by this rule.

4.) Bribery works. When we were teenagers, Mom and Dad told us they would pay us each $500 when we turned 18 if we didn’t smoke. Let’s just say they are $2500 poorer and our lungs have a clean bill of health. Dad says that it was a waste of money because none of us would have been smokers anyways, but I think he just doesn’t know how often I have used that excuse in my younger days while turning down a cigarette…

5.) If you have a plugged up nose, sleep on the opposite side. When you wake up your nose will be drained and fresh as a daisy. This one is slightly random, but whenever I fall asleep with a stuffed nose I think of this and make sure I follow Dad’s advice. It works, trust.

People always comment on how terrified our boyfriends must have been to pick us up for dates, etc. In reality, our Dad was a little bit starved for conversations about sports, farming, etc. so when the boys did come get us they were usually greeted  by Dad who would subject force encourage them to sit down and talk to him – maybe this was his pre-screening.. Really, he’s harmless – it was our mother, ‘The Dragon Lady’, who the boys were afraid of (there were threats of castration involved…). Then there was that time Micaela got picked up for a date on a motorcycle. Oooh, that was a funny night in the Blonde household.

So thanks Dad for many years of love and lessons, here’s to many, many more to come.

We love you very much.

Filed Under: Family, life, love

Keeping it in the family.

September 15, 2010 By 5 Comments

Alternatively titled: That time I almost accidentally dated my cousin.

Halfway through my second year of University, I started dating my boyfriend. We were that annoying couple that dropped everything else in their lives to spend everypossiblesecond together. We had a lot in common as we were both Dutch, Catholic pig farmers from Southwestern Ontario with big, Dutch families. Don’t worry, we had other things in common too, but for the purpose of this story the other stuff is not important.

As we were getting to know each other we started talking about our families. Somehow, a specific family came up in conversation – let’s call them the DeCalms. As he talked, I realized I knew the family he was elaborating on. I blurted out – “Wait, are you talking about the DeCalms as in M&J DeCalm?? Because I think they’re my second cousins or something.” Tim just stared at me with a face that was starting to get a little red and sweaty and informed me that the DeCalms were also his second cousins.

Insert awkward silence here as we put two and two together.

“Uhh, this is weird. Are we related?” I awkwardly asked him. You see, when you come from families like ours – big and Dutch and very friendly – you kind of just assume that if someone is also Dutch and they hang out with your family all the time and you’ve known them forever that they are somehow related to you. I’d known the DeCalms forever and they were Dutch (and awesome) and  they were close with many members of my family. Alas, I assumed they were some sort of cousins of my parents.

I quickly called my Dad to get this whole incestuous issue sorted out. To my relief, it turns out that the DeCalms used to work for my grandparents and had just remained close with our family AND WERE NOT AT ALL RELATED. “Why do you want to know?” my Dad asked. “NO REASON, no reason at all.” I hastily replied, not yet ready to announce this embarrassing misunderstanding to the world. Tim and I sighed big sighs of relief and laughed at each other and tried not to think about the possible genetically freaky babies we could have had someday.

(Props for the title idea given to the awesome Calgarian @Darlinglilred.)

Filed Under: Family, leah, life, love

Blah, blah, boys.

April 14, 2010 By 13 Comments

I’ve wanted to write a bit about my relationship for awhile, but I didn’t really know how. Or why it was important. But my relationship with my boyfriend has played such a huge role in the last two years of my life that I would feel like I was ignoring a huge part of me by not addressing it. Plus, we filed for our taxes as “common law” this year, so all of a sudden things are serious, government styles.

Two years ago I wrote about being “that girl” and following my boyfriend across the country. I was unsure if I was making the right decision and I was all messed up inside. If you’ve been reading for awhile, you’ll know that I did follow him. I followed him across the country, but not for a second was I “that girl”. While in University I was undeniably codependent with him. We spent every night together, and when we didn’t and I was anxious I was call him crying, begging him to come over. When we moved to Calgary I thought to myself that life would be perfect. That we would spend every possible moment together and cuddle all night and it didn’t matter that I didn’t have any friends out West because I had him and if I had him, nothing else matters.

Well, I learned pretty quickly that everything else? Does matter. The nature of his job meant that he was working in the evenings, and that he was working a lot. Our relationship took a toll, and we struggled through ups and downs. I reconnected with an old friend and my codependence with my boyfriend dissipated. My boyfriend became less of my best friend, and more of my boyfriend. This is a good thing, amigos.

Him and I have had to work hard to make things work. He still works mainly evenings, so I will come home for lunch and we’ll hang out for half an hour then. I’ll stay up super late and wait for him to come home, and when he gets home the first thing he does is give me a huge hug while I’m reading in bed. I’ve had to be really assertive with my needs, and not let myself feel that I am taking second place to his job. I’ve worked extra hard at making friends and meeting people in unconventional ways.

When Micaela wrote that post last week about the adoration her husband has for her, I broke down. My mind went into crisis mode and I could only focus on the faults in my relationship. All of a sudden, it wasn’t good enough. He didn’t adore me, he didn’t respect me, he wasn’t good enough. Then I shook my head and reminded me that my relationship was just that- my own. That I could compare all I wanted but in the end I had to figure out if it was working for me. And you know what? It is. He may not look at me with puppy eyes every day, but when I wake up beside him every, my life, in that moment, is good.

Filed Under: Calgary, leah, life, love

soulmates, heartbreak, airport moments, epic adventures and the meaning of love.

February 19, 2010 By 4 Comments

4 months ago, Rachel fell in love…with love stories. To be more precise, she fell in love with the idea of publishing the love stories of members of the 20SB community. Since the original post about her Love Story Project, it has grown into a blog of its own and attracted stories from bloggers and non-bloggers alike. They are stories of love experienced first-hand, and of love witnessed. The stories are happy, sad, hopeful, and inspiring. They are all individually unique and special.

Rachel has passed the reins of the Love Story Project over to us. She sent quite a few stories that are waiting to be published and we can’t wait to share them with you! Please subscribe, share a story, or suggest to a friend that they share their story. You are welcome to email your love story to fiveblondes (at) gmail.com anytime.

love story project

pic by laurenewalters

Look for the next love story to come your way on Monday. If you’ve submitted a story already, we have your contact information and will be in touch to confirm when your story will be published.

Filed Under: 20sb, love, Love Story Project, relationships Tagged With: , ,

Wanting to be wanted.

January 8, 2010 By 11 Comments

The boyfriend just came back to the city after a two week party well-deserved vacation in the homeland (where the good boy visited my sisters and hung out with my brother-in-law). Last night we were coming home from the pub out for a lovely evening stroll and I asked him about every detail of his trip home when he told me the cutest thing. His brother’s girlfriend asked him if I was the one and he had responded with yes, she is. My heart skipped a beat and I managed to find many different ways to get him to tell me that story over again without sounding too crazy.

Now this doesn’t mean there has been a ring in discussion at all, but I’ll refer to a tweet I posted last week talking about not wanting to be engaged or to be married right now but just wanting to be wanted. This conversation satisfied that wish. And to hear the person you love more than you ever thought you were capable of loving another human being ever so nonchalantly tell you that you are the one? Amazing.

As I laid in bed last night beside him my mind kept coming back to a poem I had found when we were first falling in love.

The Masks of Love.

I come in from a walk
With you
And they ask me
If it is raining.

I didn’t notice
But I’ll have to give them
The right answer
Or they’ll think I’m crazy.

-Alden Nowland

Filed Under: Calgary, love

Being kind and gentle to my soul.

December 29, 2009 By 16 Comments

I once had to do a volunteer training group when I was working at a sexual assault centre. The group ran on Thursdays from 6:00pm-10:00pm during my fourth year of University and I can’t even tell you how much I thought it was going to cramp my style. I dreaded it, but it turned out to be one of the most inspiring, moving experiences I have ever had and I looked forward to it every week. It was more of a group therapy session and was run by an amazing woman who consistently told us to be kind and gentle to our souls.

In learning to be kind and gentle to my soul, I became my best friend. By following this idea and maturing in general, I find that I love myself more and more every day. I don’t mean that in an obnoxious, narcissistic way but rather in a happy, comfortable way. The parts of my body and personality that I used to find ugly and frustrating are now some of my favourite things about myself.

For example, my feet. I used to think they were too long (size 9.5),  too skinny and too bony. Also, I have bunions on the sides of my big toes. I would always wear socks, or try to hide my feet or somehow try to make them look smaller. Now? I think my feet are quirky and fun and absolutely perfect. My feet have helped me to win races, and they fit into beautiful shoes withot complaining too much. I love my feet.

 feet

Left, my feet. Right, Nat’s beautiful feet.

What is one thing that you absolutely love about your awesome self? Tell me in the comments. You can’t imagine how great it feels to write it down and share it with others. Be kind and gentle to your soul today!

Filed Under: Calgary, leah, life, love

Micaela and Kent's weding #3: The Newlyweds.

December 14, 2009 By 5 Comments

Our wedding reception was held on my grandparents’ beautiful country property. After I got engaged I was in zero hurry to go look at reception halls (probably as a result of working at one on a golf course for one summer), but as soon as my mom mentioned a tent wedding on the farm, that’s when my mind started to go on overdrive. It may have been a LOT more work (for my mom mostly… sorry momma!) but it was totally worth it.

The day before the wedding after getting things set up in the tent, I asked Kent if he liked the tent and he replied “it’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen,” which basically summed it up for me too.

Neither of us thrive in big crowds so it was nice to have our time alone in the car (with our wonderful driver Dane of course!) and taking photos before being mauled by people and flashes. My best friend is having a tent wedding next summer and I’m really excited to be part of one from the outside (well sort of outside – I’m a bridesmaid so I’m sure I’ll help out lots.) There is a lot of stress involved with being the bride and groom when you are as anxiety prone as we are sometimes!

We were taking a chance on the weather, but exactly a year before the wedding before I was engaged I remember thinking “It’s been really nice out all week. I should get married on this week next year.” So we did and I was right – in a summer of nothing but rainy Saturdays, we got really, really, lucky. Four months later people are still telling me that. The farmer who owned the wheat field was even nice enough to keep the wheat up for the wedding. How nice is that?? It would not have been the same without it. I went back to the property the next morning and it was already being combined.

Filed Under: love, micaela, Wedding

My favourite boy and my favourite hobby.

December 11, 2009 By 9 Comments

To start off, a quote from a previous blog of mine:

“Although, I have never been one to keep things short. Except for skirts. And relationships.”

Well, that is no longer true because I don’t wear skirts at all now that I live in a city where it was -37c (-34f) this week and also because Mr. Leah and I celebrated our four (4!) year anniversary this past week.

To celebrate we took the day off work on Thursday and headed to the mountains to go snowboarding at Sunshine Village. Other than the fact that it was incredibly cold, it was a great day. The sun was shining and we practically had the mountains to ourselves. Uh-mazing.

For my birthday Mr. Leah got me a camera, and I have tried to become better at taking pictures so that’s a good thing for all of you! (Better = quantity, NOT quality!)

GondolaIn the gondola, freezing our buns off. Look at my frozen hair!

MountainsThere were moments when I looked around and just asked myself “Is this real?” It was so beautiful.

 

Filed Under: Calgary, life, love, skiing, winter
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