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It's Because I'm Psychotic. I Mean, Psychic.

June 21, 2008 By 8 Comments

Do you ever have where you just amaze yourself in weird ways (not necessarily good)? For example, extreme moments of deja vu, or those gut feelings that are soooo strong that you can’t help but ignore them- some might say a womans intuition? Well, sometimes I think I am psychic. I have two recent examples to convince you, too, that I am sometimes psychic.

Photo by saveena

Example Number One:

Back when my hunka-hunka-burnin’ love first got accepted to the wonderful job he has now, we knew he would be moving away somewhere in June. He had five options – Halifax, Muskoka, Toronto, Calgary and Vancouver (that is in the order he voted for – Halifax first, Vancouver last) but I always just KNEW that he would end up in Calgary. It was his second to last choice, but my gut just knew Calgary was it. It got to be that we – okay, I – just started saying “When you get the job in Calgary, the first thing we will do is buy a HUGE bed.” “When you get the job in Calgary do you think I will go too?” “When you get the job in Calgary, how much will you still love me on a scale from one to ten?” And this was months before his work told him his job placement! For awhile, Tim was convinced that Muskoka was it, but I always knew it Calgary was the place for us to be. And I am so glad we came here, Tim loves it almost as much as I do! By the way, he might meet Bill Clinton today, he is scheduled to be at Tim’s work this afternoon. Lucky!

Example Number Two:

A few nights ago, Tim and I were getting our daily 10:00pm dose of our favourite television show, Iron Chef America. I don’t know if all of you have seen it, but at the beginning of each episode, a new “challenger” chef is brought into “Kitchen Stadium” and the challenger chooses from one of five “Iron Chefs” (always the same five every day – Mario Batali is Tim’s favourite, Bobby Flay is mine) to battle in a competition. They have one hour to make five different items, each featuring a “secret ingredient” that is presented at the beginning of the show. (Whether or not they know of the secret ingredient beforehand is a whole other blog post altogether, and one of the main reasons Tim and I argue. He says they don’t, I say they do.) The secret ingredient can range from wild boar to puff pastry to honey to lentils, anything under the sun. Then they are judged, and either a challenger or an Iron Chef wins. Awesome show, it’s funny, it’s educational, and it inspires us to cook weird and tasty things every night.

Let the battle begin! <– The one on the left is Bobby Flay

Back to my psychic abilities – A fun thing for us to do is try and guess who the judges will be (they rotate every week, but there are a few key judges they like to use), but we never try and guess the secret ingredient because they are so random (what IS barramundi anyways?!!?), but when we were watching it the other night, as they were about to uncover the secret ingredient (it is always a really dramatic event involving lots of dry ice – see above), I just yelled out “CHOCOLATE!!!” and it WAS!!! I had never seen that episode before, I just knew it was chocolate and I had a giant urge to yell (yell, scream, whatever) it out! I then proceeded to dance around the room reminding Tim how awesome I am, and how I am psychic, and how I KNEW we were moving to Calgary before we even found out.

Anyways, I don’t think we should vote on whether or not I am REALLY a sometimes psychic, but tell me of a time when you discovered your own psychic abilities, or experienced extreme female (or male) intuition.

Filed Under: Calgary, leah, psychology Tagged With: , , , ,

I'll Let You Buy Salt if You Buy Me a Diamond Ring

April 26, 2008 By 6 Comments

ring

One important thing I have learned while dating Kent is that if I put an idea into his head, there is a good chance it will come out of his mouth as his own idea a few weeks later. Leah calls this A Sign of an Abusive Relationship. You might call it Manipulative. I call it Being Resourceful. And I promise, I only use it for good. For example: Kent drinks a LOT of diet coke. He probably drinks more per day than I would even consider drinking in a month. Which of course is really bad for him, so when he complained that he was gaining weight, I suggested maybe it was all the diet coke. No, he said, diet coke is good for you, coke is bad for you because of all the sugar. Two weeks later he said to me “I feel like I’m gaining weight. I think it’s all the diet coke.” SUCCESS! Yesterday he drank three glasses of water at work and I guess only about a million minus three glasses of diet coke. He’s a chef, I guess they get thirsty. Plus diet coke is free at the restaurant. So I suppose I’m getting somewhere, and he is three glasses of diet coke less likely to die of aspartane-related illnesses.

I also decided that if I ever want to get engaged or married or anything fun like that, I should start putting that idea into his head as well. Not that I need to get engaged RIGHT NOW, but it’s always good to start planning ahead, plus it’s fun to talk about it. I have managed to work the idea of diamonds into many conversations, for example this one:

Kent: I found this pink Himalayan salt for $200 a pound on the internet…. *a few minutes later* What’s our postal code?

Me: Are you buying $200 salt?

Kent: No, I’m buying $8 salt. I’ll buy you something too, okay?

Micaela: Is it sparkly?

This seems to be working too, but not quite in the way that I originally planned.

Micaela: Where do you think you’d be in your life right now if you weren’t dating me?

Kent: Looking for you.

Micaela: Awww.

Kent: Does that get me out of buying a ring?

Filed Under: life, love, micaela, psychology, relationships

Title Goes Here.

January 17, 2008 By 5 Comments

In response to Erica’s last post… she may love google, but google and I are not friends at the moment. The reason is that it led me to a site that tricked me into downloading something that gave me a virus. Now everytime I search google for something, the only thing that comes up is porn, or trick links that lead me to download even more viruses. Also, every time I click from one website to another, which happens a lot if you consider facebook, an error message comes up that tells me I have a virus and I should download something to get rid of it. This is another trick and it just wants me to download more viruses. FUN huh! These error messages are so weird, because they look exactly like Windows messages, but there is the occasional exclamation or spelling/grammar error so you know that it isn’t real. Kent thinks that they were put there on purpose by the makers, sort of like, if you are dumb enough not to catch the mistakes, you deserve to get a virus. Which is probably true… I mean if you are smart enough to make a CRAZY INSANE virus you probably know basic grammar. I was just thinking that English wasn’t their first language. Then again I don’t know why I am analyzing these virus makers, when I should be hating them.

I read the Globe and Mail, National Post, and London Free Press on my lunch break pretty much every day, or as much as I can get through of them. Today in the Globe and Mail I read this advice column, and I really loved the response to it… so much that I searched for it when I came home from work and now I am putting it on here to share with you. I bolded the parts that are the reason why I like it:

A reader writes: I am a well-established professional in my mid-40s and am currently going through a difficult divorce after 20 years of marriage. The first 10 years were very good, but then our relationship deteriorated and she became abusive. With the help of good counselling, I found the courage to leave. We have been separated for 10 months and I do not intend to reconcile.

Recently, I met an incredible woman. We have been dating on and off for about four months. I feel this incredible connection to her. She is, however, 20 years younger than me, but very mature for 26.

Do we have any hope for success as life partners given our disparate ages? Should I continue to pursue this relationship? And should I tell my ex? I have never lied to her, but telling her about my new love interest would destroy any chance of a negotiated divorce settlement. Any advice?

 

Dear Lucky in Love,

Kiss. But don’t tell.

Huzzah, as the cowgirls say, huzzah! Luxuriate in your new paramour. You deserve her.

Fly her to the desert when the rare Mexican poppy is in bloom. Rent a cabin and fish lake trout for dinner. Recite The Cinnamon Peeler in the middle of the night. Start smoking Century Sams. Join her punk band. Surrender to the adventure and the abundance of her youth. After a decade of living in Edward Albee’s Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf? you are in a Noel Coward play. There is no doom. And everyone lives in bathrobes.

A new lover is the antidote to the last. After so much poison, you have found your anti-venom. While I want you to fall in love with a monk’s rapturous devotion, I also want you to remember that youth has a catch: the propensity for sudden flight. Despite her maturity the world is, in her brief experience, composed only of open doors. And she must, like the heroine of her own fairy tale, walk through them and experience the contents of every room. You may be one of the rooms or you may be all of them. Only time, that belligerent truth serum, will tell.

Age gaps can be the source of some rubbernecking. People stare as though the couple, like any physical aberration, is a mismatch. When really our ages, in their crudest form, are only numbers – shapes on a page. Harold and Maude taught us that an age gap can be a prescription for living – higher than any spiritual order.

You Owe Her Nothing Tytler and Just Be Firm Stern say it: Do not tell your wife. You have no obligation. It would be like presenting a piece of heirloom lace to an ogre. She will tear it apart. Break that long-standing habit of full disclosure and finalize your settlement intact.

Jejune Chatter Frolick makes a keen point: “Go to India for at least three months. Alone.” India being the catchall for seekers, I will interpret this more broadly to mean: Insist on some self-reflective solitude. Allow your paramour’s appetite to be contagious. She is not the only one living in a world of open doors.

Filed Under: google, micaela, psychology Tagged With: , ,

Downhill…?

September 26, 2007 By 1 Comment

Ladies. We’ve gone significantly downhill in our views. EIGHT today. eight! So I’ve decided to come out of my hiding place and write a blog… I have my first midterm tomorrow in Psychology! I’ve been studying nonstop for hourrrs today, so I need a break! In other news, I’ve added the WordPress Application on Facebook, so maybe we’ll get some viewers from “carletoncanada.facebook.com” in our stats! :) hmm what to tag this as…I put answers because maybe someone will give me the answers to my psychology midterm….
I’m coming home next weekend! Is anyone more excited than I am? Didn’t think so!
Kate, if you are in need of really nice looking furniture for your house I am more than willing to provide you with a nice shelf, a very useful desk, a beautiful nightstand(which I actually hit my head on once in a while) and a squeeky bed! Great fun!
Looove Lauren

Filed Under: answer, blonde, facebook, lauren, psychology Tagged With: