The Health Crisis That Wasn’t

Over the past week or so I have been experiencing a big health scare, and while I assure you all that I am fine and dandy now, I have alluded to it over Twitter and some of you may have heard some scary rumours about me. I’ll fill you all in here.

For two weeks in November, I experienced severe chest pain. It was so bad at times, I literally couldn’t move. I would lay on the couch or in my bed for days on end, moving as little as possible. I would try to go to work, only to throw up from the pain and go home. After I figured out that this was probably more than a pulled muscle from yoga, as I originally thought, I got it checked out at the doctor.

“Pleurisy, or a pulled muscle,” he told me, and handed me a requisition for a chest x-ray. “If it still hurts in a few days get it x-rayed.” I went the following day to get it x-rayed, as the pain hit a peak. Last week I went in for the results. I felt silly going, because a few days after my x-ray I felt completely fine again. Looking at the results, the doctor was concerned. The x-ray showed ‘pleural fluid’ consistent with pleurisy, but oddly, it also showed a ‘rather ill defined density‘ in my left lung. More x-rays, and depending on the results, CT scans and more.

I was freaked out. Density in my lung? What the #$%@ does that mean? A friend of mine put it well, she said “The vocabulary alone that comes with the words density in your lung is terrifying.” For five days, the words tumour … cancer … chemotherapy … swirled around in my head. I would go from cursing the x-ray technician for doing a bad job reading the x-ray, to telling myself it was a shadow, to dying. I had to remind myself all weekend that it didn’t matter how much I worried or stressed about the new results, that it wouldn’t change the outcome at my next appointment.

Well, Monday I had the new results. I had a minor panic attack on my way to the doctors, and held my tears in in the waiting room. Will this be the end of my world as I know it? Or will I walk away from here completely normal? My doctor informed me during my appointment that whatever was there for the first x-ray, wasn’t there for the second. It was gone. I was okay. I am okay.

So to all the people who offered me support over the past week, I thank you with all of my heart. And all of my left lung. I love you all, very much.