Since graduating about a year ago, and subsequently moving across the country with the boyfriend, I have noticed a lot of changes within myself. Positive, progressive changes that make me feel as though I am growing up. I have always felt grown-up, and have generally been a thought as though I was a mature person, but in the past month or two, I am surprising myself daily.
It’s in cleaning the house and keeping it that way for more than 24 hours, in brushing and flossing twice daily, in washing my face daily and paying more attention to my beauty routine, in making doctors appointments for myself, keeping budgets, and exercising regularly, it’s in cleaning and vacuuming Tim’s car, in making my bed every single day, and in doing groceries on my own. It’s in sitting in a popular bar with my best friend discussing literature. It’s in being on time on a regular basis, and scheduling my days so I can be the most productive, and even in paying more attention to my appearance and the way I am perceived by others. It’s in going to see a documentary on a Saturday evening, and being told by your tax specialist that you didn’t seem your age, because “people your age usually don’t care about the details, they just want the money.” It’s in thinking about how my actions affect other people, and in finding myself thinking deeply about the things that are important in my life, and what I am looking for in all of my relationships.
I feel it in being more aware of my surroundings and of the life I am choosing to create for myself, and the difference I am making in the world.
So tell me, was there a moment or period of time when you really starting becoming an adult, or felt grown-up?
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I remember taking a Leadership course as a professional development opportunity a couple years out of school – it shaped my good karma approach to life into something concrete that has since penetrated everything I do. I realized it’s not about me. Nothing is – if I want success in my own life, and to help others find it too, I must make my actions about others. Now, I must also be in good condition to do that, so I still try to learn and work on myself too.
I noticed grown-up-ness when quotes like this made terrific sense:
“There’s still a kid inside but you grow up when you decide to do right, okay… and not what’s right for you, what’s right for everybody, even when it hurts.” – Gus (from Lars and the Real Girl)
I have moments, like when I am work giving a presentation and taking questions afterward. Time like that I think wow, that was a very grown up thing. I still do childish things though, like playing Rockband on Wii with the best friends for hours. =) Its a fine line that I walk.
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It was the day I found out i was going to be responsible for not only my life but the life of a baby, & that i was going to have to raise that thing growing inside of me to be a good person, and some one who contribuated to socitey on a positive note and not a negative one… I had just turned 20 three weeks prior..and every day since.
( Hell i just played Easter bunny for the 1st time.. now if that’s not being an adult I dont know what is.. haha. )
I love that quote from Lars and the real girl, such a great movie.
I don’t think there is a clear line b/w child and adult, some days I feel very childish, and others like I’m wise beyond my years. However, I agree that there are certain things that make me feel like I’m a grown up.
I have two examples. The first is realizing that I can’t please everyone, all the time, and if I continue to try I will end up miserable, and likely alone.
The second is relating to my parents as a friend and not just as a child.
I’m glad you’re move to Calgary is doing so much for you’re health. Sometimes being a bit isolated can really allow you to grow. You sound like you are in a very good place!
Seeing as I intend to surpass a hundred years of age…I’d like to think of still on the verge of growing up.
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I still feel like I’m faking it. I’m doing all kinds of adult-like things, but it feels false. I’m almost 30 for god’s sake! When do I get to feel grown up for real?
Came over via The Sisters Project, love the blog. I am one (the oldest) of 5 girls too!
Wow, great post! It’s so true that it’s all the little things that make us realize the big changes like growing up. The main change I’ve seen in myself since college is that there’s always food in the fridge. And it’s not something pre-packaged that I picked up at the grocery store or Subway, it’s interesting ingredients that I make into interesting meals. Plus, pretty much everything you just mentioned. Minus exercising regularly, I really need to get on that.
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When I get a mortgage statement every 6 months…
When I say I have to stay in tonight because i am so behind on laundry, and its true…
When it is up to only two people to make sure there are groceries, toilet paper, kleenex, and many other daily necessities, otherwise you don’t make it through the day…
When you start feeling like boyfriend isn’t enough of a title for somebody you live with, but partner still makes you feel like a lesbian…lol. not that anythings wrong with that, but you get what i am saying…
When you contemplate filing your taxes together, and you have a shared bank account.
When you laugh in flattery if you get IDed…
when you FORGET your ID and your don’t panic, because you likely won’t get IDed anyways…
Great topic Leah!! I think you have grown so much as a person, its been inspiring to watch. I admire you in ways I could never put into words, and i can’t wait to come and see you in July!
I felt strangely grown up the first time I got my 403b’s quarterly statement in the mail, detailing my “investments.” I’m still not sure how I feel about it all…
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I remember the first time I felt all ‘growned up’ – I was 20 and I had to open a bank account all by myself… in France. It was daunting, to say the least.
Ever since that moment, I’ve been trying my darndest to figure out how to stay a kid.
Great post.
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